I'm sophisticated.
Cool to the point of not feeling anything.
Things are rough all over.


That quote from " The Outsiders " kept ringing inside my mind. Its true. I can't feel anything much now. Its like my emotions were siphoned away from me.
I seemed to have lost interest in everything-Games, Music and etc.
All now I do is to just keep looking at my handphone, anticipating a message or a phone call to happen.
That Would Never Come True.
Maybe that was Just A Dream.
I suddenly had the urge to go shopping.
I felt like giving a lot of stuff away.
I don't feel like receiving already.
Right now Im just staring into thin air.
Nothing better to do.
I think Ima quit all those stuff I usually do.
Its time to grow up.
I thought that I was not myself Last Night.
But it IS me.
I cant feel anything now.
I have the urge to die.
Maybe leaping off a 60-storey high building.
I said all I had to say.
In letters that I threw away.

I felt like watching Letters To Juliet.
But, its over.
Now gotta wait for the DVD.
I wanna watch it Alone.

Lets Face it.
I have no friends.
Im stuck here in this Temporary Home.
I've been too evil.
This will be just a stop to where I would be really going.
How I wished that I was the old man lying on the Hospital Bed.
And that the room would be surrounded by people he loves.
And then I would wait for my dearest daughter to say goodbye to me.
That would never come true.
Just A Dream.
That was Just A Dream.

I had the Best Days of My Life,
And also the Worst Ones.
This roller-coaster ride of mine,
Would stop someday.
Sooner or later,
I'll pick sooner.
There is no point in living now.
Even if the tracks are long,
I wish that there would be a hole in it.
So that it would crash hard.