Please forgive me.

This week was a terrible disaster for me. Was practically trying to hold on to the Common Test week. I guess I flunked most of them, especially physics. I thought I could do better, but I think I know better right now.

I'm starting to head towards the wrong direction. These problems knock me straight on my face and I can't seem to solve them. Instead, I've just screwed someone's life upside down just because I told somebody something. I hate these situations when you cannot do anything you want to. I just have to live with the fact that I'm supposed to tell people stuff, even if that means betrayal. It all started from a simple misunderstand, and it just ended with a big bang. Like stone hearts and hand grenades.

And then there's you. When I thought everything was going to be okay, you just show up suddenly. And it always occur at the wrong times. I wanted to tell you something so badly, but I guess I didn't have the courage to do so. And when I could just get over and done with you, you just had to start a conversation with me. I think it's just a detour in whatever I'm currently doing now. Maybe there'll be times when I'd completely forget about you and would finally realize that I didn't have a friend like you. It's time to move on, but I'm flying without any wings.

Stop avoiding me. I know what I did was completely insane and wrong. But you're like ignoring me in every single way possible. I'm not implying that it's your fault, but can you just think about me for a second? Whenever I ask you a question, you'll just reply with some one-word answers which usually end the conversation. I'm not trying to do anything here. Can we still be friends? Even after what I've did to you? Guess the answer is obvious enough right now.

Today, it was supposed to be awesome. But somebody who was close to me kinda turned my day upside down. I don't really know what's going on, but based on his reaction, I guess I'm losing my confidence in myself. I really wanted to back out today. And there you are laughing like it's no one's business, especially when I'm trying my best to do whatever that I can do. Guess I'm not being appreciated huh? You know, this proved me wrong all along. I thought I could like trust you and treat you as a good friend, but now you've destroyed my confidence. What are you going to do about it?

Well, now the only thing I'm looking forward to is Adeline's birthday. Not even NDP performance can make me feel better. Oh well, I'm starting to lose hope and give up.

I guess this song would be able to describe my emotions right now.



Yes, I did that already. I needed the pain.

Didn't thought that I would succumb to this stage.