Can't go anywhere.
Sometimes I wish that it was easier. Easier to run, easier to shy yourself away from reality. Easier to master the art of letting go. I hate life. Not my life, but life in general. Why can't we all be hard hearted and do whatever we want. We would have no emotions holding us back, and we may feel free. Free to do anything we want.
Sometimes I wish that I can take back the words said. Sometimes I wish that you can be my friend again somehow, even though we messed up. I guess that made me hate telling people about my personal stuff and treating others as my close friends. But even so, it still feels like something is amiss whenever I talked to my close friends. None of my friends understood me as well as you did, well perhaps except for Adeline and Jue Ying. . Sigh. It's useless typing in this blog, knowing that you don't have access to it. But I wish you knew, somehow.
Anyway, it's not easy to toy with someone without being lost in the game. But yet everyone seems to do it one way or another. We put on masks everyday, to hide ourselves away from the truth, to conceal our true characters. We tell so many lies just to leave them on that we're tangled in them. And slowly, what you are will no longer be what you wanna be. Because those lies, they mold you. They contribute to your character, to who you are.
None of us remain naked inside. We all have masks, and it'll just be a matter of time before they are removed. A matter of time before being exposed. And that can mean either redemption, or the end of the road.
Hmm. I'm having this weird craving for the clay pot rice that is sold opposite PP CC. And it's like 3 am now. ): Anyway, the official WR deadline is today. I really hope that everything goes well because I really want that A, especially after the days staying back in school until late at night with my group mates editing it. I just hope that it'll be worth it in the end, for all the hard work put in.
There's a heartbreaking chill running through my bones.
