I wanna lick the icing off.
Ahh. This song's explicit, seductive but addictive at the same time!
I want that cake.
Friday, March 16, 2012
I never read your letter,
cause I knew what you would say.
The past month was quite exhausting for me, with all the homework and work that I gotta do. I did pretty badly with a few tests and I'm trying my best to catch up, especially physics. Choir was really disappointing for me, and I've already said my piece about it. I guess whether I step down or not, no longer makes any difference eh?
Anyway, Motivational Camp was fun for me at least. All the study skills, the humanities forum and Andrea. She's awesome. I love the wild side of her. I don't know why, but I didn't really feel inspired or even motivated from it.. Maybe it's just me, and not them. Maybe of my friends cried that day, but I didn't. Perhaps that's the reason why the impact wasn't that great on me.
Hmm.. I had a sleepover at Clarissa's house though. Matthew and Kah Wai were supposed to be there with me, but they backed out in the end. But Matthew's reason was quite pathetic. Anyway, I was the only guy there, but it was fun! Watched Insideous and finally learnt how to play Monopoly Deal! Eavesdropped at some gossip that the girls had and then went to sleep. And I feel really bad to Sarah as I kinda snored a little while I was asleep, and I was the first to be knocked out :X. Moving on, I think Sarah's quite cute when she's asleep! Seriously! And she woke up with me when my alarm sounded ( cause I was the only one who was bathing in the morning ) and then went back to sleep. No hidden intentions though! She's really like a sister to me! Feel like spilling out what's been going on with me to her. Girls are so much more trustworthy than guys.
Ahh, and I had donuts for breakfast! My first breakfast since I don't know when. Went back to school at around 7 am, and that's way past the time I go to school usually. But I'm not late, thankfully xD. Managed to sneak into choir for a short 15 minutes during breaktime and was really met with disappointment. Oh well, what can I say? However, I still have faith that they'll be able to cope when we're gone. And it'll happen in like 3 weeks now? I guess that'll be the last time I'll be wearing the full choir suit, even though I own the pants, belt, blazier and shoes xD. But I'll miss the silver tie ):. The sun will rise eventually.
Worked with Matthew and Esmonde for the mindmap project for Globalization! They're awesome people to the max! They even had some cute shots on the table, sad that they weren't posted on facebook ):. And I want to thank Matthew for being there to accompany me even though he wants to wander somewhere else in the school whenever I'm in solitude. It's so sad. It's already the last year in my Secondary school. They'll vanish from my life once we get back our 'O' level results, unless we coincidentally get posted into the same institution. I hope that my good memories in Zhonghua will never fade away..
Well, it's the holidays now. Have been going to school for like 3 times because of choir and ss ssp. Oh well, it's alright! At least I've managed to rest well after a hectic school term.
It's already 2am now, but before I end my post, I would like to share Carrie Underwood's new single here! She's awesome! And I can't wait to get her new album. Also, I will share some of the other new songs that are released this year!
Good Girl - Carrie Underwood
Climax - Usher
Part of Me - Katy Perry
Starships - Nicki Minaj
Girls Gone Wild - Madonna
Stronger ( What Doesn't Kill You ) - Kelly Clarkson
Over You - Miranda Lambert
Turn Up the Music - Chris Brown feat. Rihanna
And of course, a good cover of Adele's next single, Rumor Has It!
For the Studio version,
Alright then, Goodnight (:.
Daddy make a wish,
Put this cake in your face.
And it's not even my birthday.
cause I knew what you would say.
The past month was quite exhausting for me, with all the homework and work that I gotta do. I did pretty badly with a few tests and I'm trying my best to catch up, especially physics. Choir was really disappointing for me, and I've already said my piece about it. I guess whether I step down or not, no longer makes any difference eh?
Anyway, Motivational Camp was fun for me at least. All the study skills, the humanities forum and Andrea. She's awesome. I love the wild side of her. I don't know why, but I didn't really feel inspired or even motivated from it.. Maybe it's just me, and not them. Maybe of my friends cried that day, but I didn't. Perhaps that's the reason why the impact wasn't that great on me.
Hmm.. I had a sleepover at Clarissa's house though. Matthew and Kah Wai were supposed to be there with me, but they backed out in the end. But Matthew's reason was quite pathetic. Anyway, I was the only guy there, but it was fun! Watched Insideous and finally learnt how to play Monopoly Deal! Eavesdropped at some gossip that the girls had and then went to sleep. And I feel really bad to Sarah as I kinda snored a little while I was asleep, and I was the first to be knocked out :X. Moving on, I think Sarah's quite cute when she's asleep! Seriously! And she woke up with me when my alarm sounded ( cause I was the only one who was bathing in the morning ) and then went back to sleep. No hidden intentions though! She's really like a sister to me! Feel like spilling out what's been going on with me to her. Girls are so much more trustworthy than guys.
Ahh, and I had donuts for breakfast! My first breakfast since I don't know when. Went back to school at around 7 am, and that's way past the time I go to school usually. But I'm not late, thankfully xD. Managed to sneak into choir for a short 15 minutes during breaktime and was really met with disappointment. Oh well, what can I say? However, I still have faith that they'll be able to cope when we're gone. And it'll happen in like 3 weeks now? I guess that'll be the last time I'll be wearing the full choir suit, even though I own the pants, belt, blazier and shoes xD. But I'll miss the silver tie ):. The sun will rise eventually.
Worked with Matthew and Esmonde for the mindmap project for Globalization! They're awesome people to the max! They even had some cute shots on the table, sad that they weren't posted on facebook ):. And I want to thank Matthew for being there to accompany me even though he wants to wander somewhere else in the school whenever I'm in solitude. It's so sad. It's already the last year in my Secondary school. They'll vanish from my life once we get back our 'O' level results, unless we coincidentally get posted into the same institution. I hope that my good memories in Zhonghua will never fade away..
Well, it's the holidays now. Have been going to school for like 3 times because of choir and ss ssp. Oh well, it's alright! At least I've managed to rest well after a hectic school term.
It's already 2am now, but before I end my post, I would like to share Carrie Underwood's new single here! She's awesome! And I can't wait to get her new album. Also, I will share some of the other new songs that are released this year!
Good Girl - Carrie Underwood
Climax - Usher
Part of Me - Katy Perry
Starships - Nicki Minaj
Girls Gone Wild - Madonna
Stronger ( What Doesn't Kill You ) - Kelly Clarkson
Over You - Miranda Lambert
Turn Up the Music - Chris Brown feat. Rihanna
And of course, a good cover of Adele's next single, Rumor Has It!
For the Studio version,
Alright then, Goodnight (:.
Daddy make a wish,
Put this cake in your face.
And it's not even my birthday.
It's too late to apologize.
And you should be the one supposed to say that.
I'm really sorry for not blogging for the entire month. I think my mind was drained for the past month. Not because of homework, but because of some personal problems. How I wished I could go back in time and make everything alright, but I know I can't.
It's the holidays now, but you're the one that I think about all day. Maybe that's the reason why I can't seem to focus and do my own thing. I've granted your wish. I've blocked you in every possible way that I could think of. It was really then or never. Well, I guess none of my readers will be able to guess who, except for Jue Ying. But still, things seemed to be alright for her. I doubt that she'll be able to sense anything wrong with me, knowing that she hardly visits my blog nowadays.
Will I let hatred or misery get the better of me? No. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. But looking back at all the things that we did, and all the things that you said, perhaps not. You were an expert at sorry and making lines blurry, but why couldn't you do that when that occurred just now?
It seems that I was right in the end, even though I was really hoping that you'll prove me and my thoughts wrong. But what can I say? It was my fault to begin with, and yet you kept apologizing to me. I don't know whether it's considered as crying, but I kinda teared just now, with all the things that you dished out at me. I deserved it. I deserved every single thing that you've talked about me.
I feel numb- completely emotionless. I know that you'll be able to live your life without me, as you've been doing that for the past 3 months. I guess no one would ever find out what exactly happened. And no, it isn't a breakup from a relationship if some of you are reading this.
I haven't seen the best that love has to offer.
They say perfection's always round the corner, it could be true.
That's a lie.
Never thought we ever last kiss.
And you should be the one supposed to say that.
I'm really sorry for not blogging for the entire month. I think my mind was drained for the past month. Not because of homework, but because of some personal problems. How I wished I could go back in time and make everything alright, but I know I can't.
It's the holidays now, but you're the one that I think about all day. Maybe that's the reason why I can't seem to focus and do my own thing. I've granted your wish. I've blocked you in every possible way that I could think of. It was really then or never. Well, I guess none of my readers will be able to guess who, except for Jue Ying. But still, things seemed to be alright for her. I doubt that she'll be able to sense anything wrong with me, knowing that she hardly visits my blog nowadays.
Will I let hatred or misery get the better of me? No. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. But looking back at all the things that we did, and all the things that you said, perhaps not. You were an expert at sorry and making lines blurry, but why couldn't you do that when that occurred just now?
It seems that I was right in the end, even though I was really hoping that you'll prove me and my thoughts wrong. But what can I say? It was my fault to begin with, and yet you kept apologizing to me. I don't know whether it's considered as crying, but I kinda teared just now, with all the things that you dished out at me. I deserved it. I deserved every single thing that you've talked about me.
I feel numb- completely emotionless. I know that you'll be able to live your life without me, as you've been doing that for the past 3 months. I guess no one would ever find out what exactly happened. And no, it isn't a breakup from a relationship if some of you are reading this.
I haven't seen the best that love has to offer.
They say perfection's always round the corner, it could be true.
That's a lie.
Never thought we ever last kiss.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
I'm at a loss of words now. I've been trying too hard to convince myself that I should move on, instead of holding on to the past. I guess the time had come eh? Just like what I had expected before all this bullshit entered into our lives. And there comes the one mistake that I never fail to make every year, one that never fails to break/weaken the friendship between my friends, one that makes me afraid that if others knew about it, I'll be screwed.
I know that you might not have the time to read my blog anymore, or it's just that you're avoiding it purposely. But nevertheless, I just wanna find peace in my blog, and experience the usual feel of serenity whenever I post something really personal inside it. I still vividly remember you telling me that maybe, things would get better. And I believed you. Thanks for offering me your endless encouragements and your witty jokes whenever I felt really down. Thanks for standing by my side whenever my world was crashing at my feet. But somehow, I couldn't see things right in that moment of time. It's like I was blinded, or perhaps, distracted. Little did I know/expect that you'd be the one throwing my world around whenever you felt like it. Now, it feels like I'm left alone hanging by a thread, and it's really a long way down.
I wished things went back to the ways they were before. Times when you wouldn't feel annoyed talking to me, or even trying to dig out words from your brain to avoid telling me stuff with a hidden meaning. I'm really sorry for all the trouble that I've caused you. Maybe, you've felt that way since the first day I've met you, just that you didn't make a single sound about what I said or did. Perhaps I would like it that way, and even if it causes me to be delusional, at least I'll be happy right?
Maybe its good to have the truth smacked right out on your face. It might put an end to all my wishful thinking etc. It had been all my fault. Have you been trying to tell me your true thoughts since the first conversation that I'd started with you? Sigh. And now, every time I speak, you'll either try to stop or ignore me completely. I guess everything that I say will be wrong in your eyes.
I should just stop trying, and move on with my life. Hey, what happened to no crying your heart out during the graduating year? What happened to the promise I made to study hard for the final lap in my Secondary School Life? Time has been rushing past me these days. Maybe it's just that I lack the time management and that I'm easily distracted by the various events that occur around me.
Sigh. What should I do to make you change your mind? T.T
Just ask me to stay,
and I'll stay.
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Monday, January 30, 2012
There was a side of you that I never knew.
Hello guys! I'm really sorry about the my blog's inactivity for the past few weeks. I did not have any inspiration to post anything, and my mind's been filled with many personal events. In addition, I'm seriously going bonkers with my Sec 4 life. I wonder how can my friends handle their homework load so efficiently? I'm barely keeping up with all my schoolwork. And some may say that I've been using my computer a bit too often recently, but I can't possibly focus on my work after a tiring day at school.
It's almost the end of January now, and I'm disappointed with myself in the ways that I've managed myself in the previous weeks. Sec 4 life, parents' forum and the competitiveness in my class - they're not exactly making me motivated to start studying/ revising for my work.
I've been practically failing all my HCL assignments that Jiang Lao Shi gave to the class. The only exception was my bao zhang, which barely made its grade. Sigh, and I've been spending a lot of time on the subject. I feel like drifting myself away from the subject, but I can't. Maybe that's because I wanna work harder on that subject to at least pass my O levels so that I can get my 2 bonus points! But it's pretty hard for me as my world in HCL is falling apart.
Also, my Chemistry. From my A1 standards dropping to an A2. That's not a joke. I can sense Ms Ong's disappointment in me, and I sat at the first row! Some of my friends got like 39.5/40, but I barely made an A2. That's pathetic right? Sigh, I really wanna work on my weaker subjects, but if I do so, I'll be neglecting my strengths. Guess that it's all about the balance eh?
Good news? My physics finally improved! I'm glad to say that I managed to jump back to my A2! Maybe that's because of my Physics tuition and Mr Tang! And I'm really satisfied with my marks now and will continue to strive for my A1!
AND FINALLY, EVER SINCE SEC 3 SEMESTER 2, I MANAGED TO UNDERSTAND MR LEE'S LESSONS FOR AMATHS! It feels like an achievement.. And I'll try not to owe Stella anymore homework for more than 2 weeks! Glad that I'm starting to cope up well with my Differentiation, even though I'm still relatively weaker in that topic as compared to people like Esmonde, Clarissa and Matthew..
I feel that I don't understand Biology any longer since the year started. I don't know why, but even if I try my best to pay attention to Mr Chong, I can't seem to understand his lessons! And the worst part? I don't even know what I don't understand, and there's a test this Thursday! I gotta work on the Eye and the Nervous System! It really requires some motivation to get the job done eh?
Moving on, my CCA. Life in choir has been pretty good with all the induction workshops etc. But I still feel framed in choir because my conductor has been picking on me recently, and I can't seem to find out what I've been singing wrongly because my mind tells me otherwise. ><. Anyway, it's glad to induct my juniors into choir! They're all so friendly, but some are acting a bit too spoiled for their age. Maybe that's because they aren't used to Secondary School life, but my patience is waning.
Life in Sec 4 is tough, but I'm not giving up, because I know that I'll be able to make it through. I don't know why, but it seems like when I reach out to my friends, the distance between us starts to widen ):. Maybe that's because I haven't been interacting with them since I entered Sec 3, so I plan to pull them back into my life as I endure my Sec 4 life ):. Besides, if it wasn't for them, I wouldn't be alive right now.
So, I'm going to summarize what I had done in January :
- Celebrate Mr Goh's Birthday!
- Appointment of Monitors ( Yes, I'm still going to be defiant and not wear my tie (: )
- Parent's Forum
- Lunch with Friends!
- CNY Celebrations ( with 4e6 taking the crown for CNY decoration compeition )
- Overseas trip to Indonesia (:
- The loss of my E-dictionary and my water bottle ):
- Choir Induction Workshop
- CCA Open House
Btw, Carrie Underwood is gonna come back with a sizzling new single! Can't wait to hear it next month (:.
Well, that's all for today, and I can't really guarantee any more posts for this year! But I'll try to squeeze some time to make a proper post sometimes alright?
Maybe it's a good thing to sit beside girls.
Because they'll offer their opinions to me in whatever that I do (:
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Got my middle finger up,
but I don't really give a fuck.
That was one of the best quotes made by Rihanna :D. Life can be disappointing at times, so we shouldn't really care too much about the stuff that's occasionally popping up to us. Sigh, I'm really sorry for breaking my promise to all of my readers ):. Really had the urge to blog, but I can't seem to squeeze any time for it..
Anyway, the first week of being Sec 4 has already emerged past. I guess it was kinda stressful for me? With stacks of homework and revision that're specially prepared for us and I had like 5 hours of sleep a day? Felt like fainting during choir ):. Need to offer my gratitude to Rowena and Joyce for taking care of their dear mother (^^) and managing the choir.. Actually, I think that the volume of my voice has shrunk over the years in Zhonghua. Is it because I don't really like shouting anymore..? I'm not sure..
Oh yeah, time to introduce the teachers who will be guiding me throughout my entire Sec 4 life! I'm pretty contented about what I have, based on their teaching skills and of course, the other band's teacher.
English : Mr Lim Yong Khern ( was a tad upset that I didn't get Miss Crystal Ling, but I think he teaches the technical areas better than Miss Ling, even though she gives inspiration and massive chunks of vocabulary to the class each day.. )
E Maths : Miss Estee Teo ( WAS REALLY UPSET THAT MRS NG LEFT ):. I LOVED HER SO MUCH ):. Not bad, but I prefer her lessons without the use of the visualizer.. And she ensures that the students grasp the concepts well (: )
Amaths : Mr Lee Moh Choon ( Let bygones be bygones~. I think he's really awesome, as compared to Koh HS, but it's alright! Things will be more strict especially when we're at the senior level.. Will try to complete his homework.. )
Chemistry : Miss Ong Lay Hong ( I LOVE HER! I'm fine with both, actually.. But still, her lessons are really interesting and she never fails to crack a joke in class! I think my Chemistry did surprisingly well because of her.. )
Physics : Mr Lawrence Tang ( YAY! My Sec 1/2 teacher! My impression of him hasn't changed over the years! He's awesome :3. )
Biology : Mr Desmond Chong ( I think that he's fine, but Ms Rozi teaches a lil' better though :X. But he's making us do the Biology Journal ):. Anyway, he's really different in class as compared to the podium! Even though he's not as detailed, he still manages to let the students grasp the concepts well.. )
HCL : Mdm Jiang Ruifang ( I'm really happy that I got her, even though she tends to pile a tremendous load of homework on us :X. Well, she teaches really well and I'll be motivated to do my homework right? xD )
Social Studies : Miss Noraini ( I heard that she wasn't really a good teacher, but based on her first lesson in Sec 4, I feel that she teaches pretty well.. I hope things remain the same throughout this entire year (:. PS. She can teach English too! )
Geography Elective : Mrs Wong Check Siew ( She's awesome! One of the most experienced teachers in the humanities department. Her way of teaching is fantastic! (: )
And guess who's my mentor? Ms Noraini! Well, I wasn't really surprised, knowing that I did terribly for my combined Humanities and English. I really hope that she can save me as she obtained a Humanities degree as well as a degree in English :D.
Hmm, moving on, I think that things are getting a little bit ( more like extremely ) tense in my class. Well, we're just ordinary students, but teachers tend to discriminate us just because we take Triple Science >:(. Anyway, have been seeing lots of classmates studying in class during their free periods and that really bothers me because I barely started my revision.. And I've been seeing many people studying together after school too ):. Argh. I'm getting really stressed up now :X.
Anyway, guess who's sitting beside me? Adeline and Jue Ying! They're awesome people! (:. It's a first time for me sitting beside Adeline even though I've been with her for 2 years.. But she really concentrates in class and does all her homework. WHY DOESN'T ANYBODY NOT DO THEIR HOMEWORK IN TRIPLE SCIENCE? IT'S LIKE I'M THE NAUGHTIEST KID THERE. ):
I think I'm going to end my post now. My apologies for the abrupt ending ):. Bye (:
I cannot cry because I know that that's weakness in your eyes.
I'm forced to fake a laugh, a smile everyday of my life.
My heart can't possibly break,
when it wasn't whole to start with.
but I don't really give a fuck.
That was one of the best quotes made by Rihanna :D. Life can be disappointing at times, so we shouldn't really care too much about the stuff that's occasionally popping up to us. Sigh, I'm really sorry for breaking my promise to all of my readers ):. Really had the urge to blog, but I can't seem to squeeze any time for it..
Anyway, the first week of being Sec 4 has already emerged past. I guess it was kinda stressful for me? With stacks of homework and revision that're specially prepared for us and I had like 5 hours of sleep a day? Felt like fainting during choir ):. Need to offer my gratitude to Rowena and Joyce for taking care of their dear mother (^^) and managing the choir.. Actually, I think that the volume of my voice has shrunk over the years in Zhonghua. Is it because I don't really like shouting anymore..? I'm not sure..
Oh yeah, time to introduce the teachers who will be guiding me throughout my entire Sec 4 life! I'm pretty contented about what I have, based on their teaching skills and of course, the other band's teacher.
English : Mr Lim Yong Khern ( was a tad upset that I didn't get Miss Crystal Ling, but I think he teaches the technical areas better than Miss Ling, even though she gives inspiration and massive chunks of vocabulary to the class each day.. )
E Maths : Miss Estee Teo ( WAS REALLY UPSET THAT MRS NG LEFT ):. I LOVED HER SO MUCH ):. Not bad, but I prefer her lessons without the use of the visualizer.. And she ensures that the students grasp the concepts well (: )
Amaths : Mr Lee Moh Choon ( Let bygones be bygones~. I think he's really awesome, as compared to Koh HS, but it's alright! Things will be more strict especially when we're at the senior level.. Will try to complete his homework.. )
Chemistry : Miss Ong Lay Hong ( I LOVE HER! I'm fine with both, actually.. But still, her lessons are really interesting and she never fails to crack a joke in class! I think my Chemistry did surprisingly well because of her.. )
Physics : Mr Lawrence Tang ( YAY! My Sec 1/2 teacher! My impression of him hasn't changed over the years! He's awesome :3. )
Biology : Mr Desmond Chong ( I think that he's fine, but Ms Rozi teaches a lil' better though :X. But he's making us do the Biology Journal ):. Anyway, he's really different in class as compared to the podium! Even though he's not as detailed, he still manages to let the students grasp the concepts well.. )
HCL : Mdm Jiang Ruifang ( I'm really happy that I got her, even though she tends to pile a tremendous load of homework on us :X. Well, she teaches really well and I'll be motivated to do my homework right? xD )
Social Studies : Miss Noraini ( I heard that she wasn't really a good teacher, but based on her first lesson in Sec 4, I feel that she teaches pretty well.. I hope things remain the same throughout this entire year (:. PS. She can teach English too! )
Geography Elective : Mrs Wong Check Siew ( She's awesome! One of the most experienced teachers in the humanities department. Her way of teaching is fantastic! (: )
And guess who's my mentor? Ms Noraini! Well, I wasn't really surprised, knowing that I did terribly for my combined Humanities and English. I really hope that she can save me as she obtained a Humanities degree as well as a degree in English :D.
Hmm, moving on, I think that things are getting a little bit ( more like extremely ) tense in my class. Well, we're just ordinary students, but teachers tend to discriminate us just because we take Triple Science >:(. Anyway, have been seeing lots of classmates studying in class during their free periods and that really bothers me because I barely started my revision.. And I've been seeing many people studying together after school too ):. Argh. I'm getting really stressed up now :X.
Anyway, guess who's sitting beside me? Adeline and Jue Ying! They're awesome people! (:. It's a first time for me sitting beside Adeline even though I've been with her for 2 years.. But she really concentrates in class and does all her homework. WHY DOESN'T ANYBODY NOT DO THEIR HOMEWORK IN TRIPLE SCIENCE? IT'S LIKE I'M THE NAUGHTIEST KID THERE. ):
I think I'm going to end my post now. My apologies for the abrupt ending ):. Bye (:
I cannot cry because I know that that's weakness in your eyes.
I'm forced to fake a laugh, a smile everyday of my life.
My heart can't possibly break,
when it wasn't whole to start with.
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